Take A Peek At What's In My Morning And Night
A couple of weeks ago, one of my friends asked me about my 'Morning Pages' but sometimes I just don't want other people to read it. 😂 Take's a simple activity that you do first thing in the morning where you just... write.
I love this because I always wake up with so many tabs already open in my head: a list of things to do and finish, people, work, Inzaghi (a bird) to check on and so many other things in between. But writing my Morning Pages allowed me to reconnect with the one thing that is most important in my life but often times most neglected: my heart.
I realised that I have all this "information" about things that really do not benefit me in my Akhirah (and Dunia too!) but I know very little about the state of my heart. And that made me sad - imagine a best friend who's always there for you, who helps you shoulder the weight of so many of your problems, never leaving your side, but you barely give her a minute of your time nor attention.
That is what a lot of us do with our hearts. So when I started writing the Morning Pages, it helped me sit with my heart, listened to what she's trying to tell me, and made me sit up straight, noticing things I have been missing out on, Alhamdulillah.
You see, there are no right or wrong ways to do these Morning Pages, the goal here is to just let your mind and your heart flow. It is your safe space as no one sees what you are writing but you and Allah SWT, so be completely unfiltered, vulnerable, and raw.
If anything, your heart deserves to be authentic with you.
So here's how it works for me - and you are more than welcome to tweak it to suit you. As soon as I'm done with my Fajr prayers and Quran recitations, I'll sit down to write my morning pages.
At first, I wrote with pen and paper, but I realised that my hands simply cannot keep up with my overflowing thoughts and that my handwriting in the morning was just... incomprehensible. So I moved to my phone instead.
Some days it flows better than others, other days I stare, type, delete, and type and delete all over again. But every day when I do these morning pages, my heart feels full because I've emptied it out.
Here are some questions / prompts that have helped me open myself up a little when I write these morning pages, I pray may it be of benefit.
1) How do you feel this morning?
2) What is it that you can't stop thinking about this morning?
3) What are you grateful for this morning?
4) What can you do to make today better than yesterday?
5) What is the most beautiful thing in your life today?
Remember: it doesn't have to be cohesive or has any form of structure whatsoever. Just let loose when you write - that's the whole point.
I'll now share with you a tiny portion of my Morning Pages today.
I did not want to write this morning but I know myself best - when I don't want to do things, that's when I know I must do it. I have to be comfortable with the discomfort, to make friends with my fear, to be at ease with the striving. Because the Path to Allah is a labour of the heart. My goal is to retort "Try me!"
Whenever the Nafs and the Devil try to talk me out of doing good things - even if some days that reply may be a faint whisper rather than a loud, firm cry. Life is so beautiful, and crazy, and boring, and quick all at once - that's what makes it worth living, isn't it? You never know what Allah SWT has in store for you for the day but you know in your heart of hearts that everything He gives you is from a place of His Love.
As a writer, I thought I would have nothing to write for my Morning Pages because I write frequently for work. But there's an unexplainable thrill of knowing that no one gets to read what you write and so I took advantage of that priceless freedom and I've never been happier.
How do we judge what is valuable? Basic gratitude. There is such a thing as a basic gratitude for everything that is as it is. Writing is an integral part of the process of understanding. Pleasure, which is fundamentally the intensified awareness of reality, springs from a passionate openness to the world and love of it.
You can of course try it if you want!
To writing, expressing and living more,
Sena.
PS: If your morning is frenzied, try "Night Pages" instead? The key thing here is to let your heart breathe by allowing it to flow after you've neglected, overlooked and shut it tight for so long 💜
Tasikmalaya, 18 July 2021
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